Opera North at Sadler’s Wells
29th November 2008
Hairy McMungo is delighted to present the first ever review by his wee lassie Caledonia. As Caledonia can’t write yet (she is only two), Hairy will transcribe her critique of her first ever opera - though she has spent so much time listening to Hairy McMungo practising, she probably knows his repertoire as well as he does. She’s a very good Tamino.
At the beginning of the opera, the piece of wood that will be made into Pinocchio talks to Gepetto, demanding to be made: “Who’s that?” asks Caledonia but she doesn’t look impressed by Hairy’s answer.
Then a hand shoots out from the log and hits Gepetto. “Arms!” cries an excited Caledonia. “Magic wood.”
The character of Pinocchio fascinates her. Caledonia smiles when Pinocchio sells his schoolbook in order to get some Money. She is surprised when Hairy tells her that Pinocchio is played by a lady - mezzo-soprano Victoria Simmonds. “Lady!” she says happily the next time she sees Pinocchio.
Caledonia develops an immediate affection for baritone Jonathan Summers (Gepetto): “Nice man,” she says approvingly after hearing only a few lines from him.
Later, Caledonia plays Summers the highest compliment of all. “Scottish?” she asks.
Soprano Rebecca Bottone displays some high virtuosic singing as the Cricket “Squeaky,” Caledonia says approvingly.
Caledonia enjoys Bottone’s singing again when she reappears as the Parrot. When she hears the Parrot’s raucous peals of laughter, Caledonia tries to join in, not without success.
A short way into the opera, Pinocchio is given some gold coins. “Money!” Hairy’s clever girl says delightedly.
The Cat (Mark Wilde) and the Fox (James Laing) attempt to steal the Money when they offer to take Pinocchio to the non-existent Field of Miracle. If you plant coins there, they will grow into trees with Money on them. Hairy only wishes this were true.
Pinocchio is fooled but Hairy’s clever wee girl is not. She gasps in horrified delight.
Counter tenor James Laing might have confused some young children, but not Caledonia. “Counter tenor!” she says at once. He’s an exceptionally good one, Hairy thinks, if not in the great Scottish counter tenor Reno Troilus’ league.
But Caledonia’s opinions on tenor Mark Wilde’s Cat change completely when she learns he is from Scotland: “Furry,” she says.
Soprano Mary Plazas’ Blue Fairy is also well-received. “Pretty,” Caledonia says, then adds: “Butterfly!” when she sees the Blue Fairy’s wings. “Pretty song,” she says later, her critical faculties already well advanced.
Bass Graeme Broadbent’s Ape-Judge, who headbangs throughout Pinocchio’s trial, is initially stared at in confusion. Hairy explains that he’s dancing, and Caledonia copies him. She later agrees she’d quite like to be a lawyer like her auntie when she grows up so she can see more dancing judges. Hairy McMungo is very proud that she’s interested in such a well-paid profession.
Broadbent sings several roles, and Caledonia boos him and laughs at him in the right places.
The beach scene, where Pinocchio tries to save Gepetto from drowning is very dramatic. Caledonia is fearful as the stage goes dark. Hairy McMungo looks ahead in the synopsis and assures her Gepetto is fine, then buys her an ice-cream with his own Money to take her mind off it.
Another seashore scene is shown after the interval. Caledonia gasps and clutches at her daddy’s hand when a Giant appears and tries to eat Pinocchio.
The fish that actually does succeed in eating Pinocchio is slightly less scary. “All gone?” says Caledonia.
Hairy, having already checked for the Happy Ever After ending, tells her he’s fine.
But Caledonia is glad the fish ate Pinocchio when she discovers Gepetto has been eaten by the fish as well. “Poco’s daddy!” she cries, recognising him before Pinocchio does. “Awwwww,” Caledonia says, but in a Scottish accent of course, not an American accent.
When Gepetto collapses with exhaustion, Caledonia is worried again but Hairy tells her he’s going to be okay.
“Hooray!” Caledonia says when Pinocchio helps Gepetto to swim out of the asthmatic fish’s mouth, then adds “Good girl,” when she remembers Victoria Simmonds’ gender. Gepetto is told that he needs to drink milk in order to get better and Caledonia nods, understanding. “Cadonia drink milk.”
Caledonia likes the look of Funland when Pinocchio and his friends arrive especially once they start turning into donkeys. “Donk!” she says happily. Caledonia has decided that she will not use baby words like horsie, doggie – and donkey.
When Pinocchio’s Lampwick (Allan Clayton), says he is dying, Caledonia is unperturbed. She doesn’t seem to realise Lampwick really is dying and Hairy decides not to explain.
Caledonia is tired when the opera reaches its happy end but she’s not too sleepy to applaud. She cheers everyone, then joins in the good-natured booing of James Laing and Mark Wilde, as two of the baddies. But she also gives Scottish Mark some very loud cheers as well. She cheers Victoria Simmonds and Jonathan Summers particularly loudly.
Hairy McMungo thinks the opera is a little too long but Jonathan Dove’s music is tuneful, if not the type of music that Caledonia is singing on the way out. Alastair Middleton’s words were very amusing, and there were some inventive costumes and sets from Francis O’Connor. Although it is based on a children’s story Hairy did not find it babyish at all – probably less so in some ways than a number of well-known adults’ operas. It reminds Hairy in some ways of Cosi fan tutte – an amusing story on the surface but with darker undertones.
CALEDONIA and HAIRY McMUNGO
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